Friend X

Paco, Anais' pug son.

Anais, friend X from dreams burn but in ashes are gold, part III wrote to me:

I am completely 100% cured. The reason? No therapy! Massive amounts of therapy and people telling me why I was the way I was, made me more nervous and more anxious. In turn, I let it go – I started loving myself – doing things on my own – being more responsible for myself – telling myself no matter what I’m here for you (in my own mind). Then the funniest thing happened: I got stuck in an elevator at a hospital when I went to visit my friend who’d delivered a new baby. I wasn’t just stuck – i was literally walled in – there were only 2 cm’s of space btwn the floor and the wall I was stuck in and facing when I looked up. I felt at first that I couldn’t breathe but then slowly i told myself: see, you’re in the worst situation you ever imagined and you’re not dead, you’re not in pain, sure you’re a little nervous and want to throw up – but try n calm yourself down. So I DID just that – I told myself be calm – i kept pressing the ER button and eventually someone came in and told me to wait five mins for them to get the key to adjust the doors. And so they did – I was out in 10 mins – 10 mins that had made me realise, life is too short to worry – if things are meant to happen they’ll happen but in the process I don’t want to be in fear. I don’t want to be held back because of myself.

As a result – I go in every elevator now – even dinky ones that def need some maintenance. We don’t have the subway but I’ll get into tight spaces and not be scared, I’ll park underground, I’ll go out into fields in the desert where tehre’s no one around to rescue me. And honestly – all I feel is…freedom 🙂
love you x

I had to put up the dog. I miss that crazy little ____.


  1. No trackbacks yet.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: